Tuesday, February 1, 2011

Answered Prayers

Our children are often in our prayers, as are their family.  Oh, I don't feel I pray as often as I should, but I do my best.  Last week I decided that rather than just praying "for" our children, I would throw in a little something more specific.  Heavenly Father, I'm going to pray that this little baby go to his family.  Or something like that.  Yep, I asked God to take this beautiful baby away from our family and to go to his own family.  That was on Sunday.  On Wednesday I got a call from the case worker.  The Call.  Paperwork was finally done, the baby would be going home to his grandparents on Friday. 

Friday.  That gives me two days.  Hold on a minute, God.  I know this is what I asked for, but isn't that a little short notice?  I mean, our little munchkin is almost walking.  I want to see him walk across MY living room.  I have a lot to pack.  I haven't finished his lifebook.  I haven't even started his lifebook!

This was our first reunification.  So many emotions went through me.  This is the last time I give him a bath.  This is the last time I sing to him.  This is the last time I lay him down for the night.  Every time I thought that I would cry.  I did a fair share of crying for those two days.

Those two days before he left was a whirlwind of activity at our house.  Much packing, getting paperwork ready.  I typed up his daily schedule for the grandparents.  I am so grateful that I have a good relationship with the grandparents, and the birth mother.  Well, as good a relationship as I could have.

Finally, Friday arrived.  I brought our little munchkin to Social Services, where we met the grandparents.  There we unloaded my vehicle (a large-sized suv) and packed their vehicle (compact car).  Then, after the packing, unpacking, and packing up again, I had to say goodbye.  I had to give him back. 

That was the moment that, when I tell people that I am a foster parent, most people bring up why they could never do what I do.  Having to give the baby up.  Give the baby up?  He was never mine to keep.

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